Some concerns about same gender loving women on the rock

With the recent murders of several men who have sex with men and related issues taking centre stage on mainstream news and in the LGBT community's gaze the same gender loving female community issues get overlooked sometimes but one concerned sister in the community shared with me and another influential a story of one of her friends who is going through a rough time so to speak with the forced eviction from her home by predominantly her father which led her to leave voluntarily after a heated argument with him among other things.


You will appreciate not all the details will be presented here but the ones relevant so as to raise some issues.





We since arranged a meeting with the young lady who spoke candidly about her dilemma as she crashes with another friend in a kind of alternative crisis intervention plan. 

.......... here is an old audio post I had done in 2011 raising person's willingness to provide temporary accommodation to other LGBTians who may need emergency shelter after a traumatic or phobic event.

Some considerations ..... would you assist someone who has been displaced ???

Same gender loving women too also go through displacements but we often do not hear about them that much as MSMs are more prominent and visible in as far as the outcomes are concerned leading to sometimes full homelessness. She was willing to share her story and allowed some minor details to be shared via this blog in a bid to carry on the discussion about insensitive parents and their separation from their LGBT siblings once perceived or found to be gay, lesbian, bisexual or even transgender though often confused as a cross dressing gay individual.

Issues here in this case included:

1) Profiling


2) Prying into personal stuff and space (where the displaced woman's father searched her room sometimes in her absence and kept asking questions such as where was her boyfriend?)


3) Restrictions of the use of the computer as her father thought she may be influenced by some lesbian, his resolve was allegedly strengthened during the brouhaha over the lesbian coercion matter in the media earlier this year although she was already out of the home voluntarily.  


4) One parent showing slight support - i.e. her mother showed some concern but had to be discreet in her connections as her husband the victim's father would scold her upon realizing or finding out that contact was made


5) The victim's desire to reconnect despite the opposition from her father but does not know where to turn for proper psycho social assistance


6) Other friends impatience with her suggesting she get over the issue and move on while implying she must forget her parents altogether


7) Her father's unease with her semi masculine or stud aesthetic


Linking up:

The recent discussion on a television program "All Angles" hosted by Dionne Jackson Miller (just above time:1:41 onwards) resonated somewhat with her mother more so than her father as both saw the program on TVJ hence the attempts to reconnect even more thus allowing for some discreet visits to the home of course in the absence of her father, as she outlined this development it was clear to me that she was moved by that first visit back to the home as her reactions proved she was touched by the development.


It is however good she could have reconnected in some way but her friend and I are in no way capable or qualified to counsel her as to this type of intervention where families are concerned, although peer support is indeed helpful in some respects, the most her friends have been doing already was encourage her to move on and suggested as aforementioned permanent separation from her parents as a solution. 


The psycho social support here is needed as I have been reiterating in previous posts referrals sometimes do not work and not all counseling experts are LGBT specific in their practice and do not know how to handle related issues. There was an infamous case years ago where a lesbian was referred to a counselor and she was told in the session to seek God and the whole nine yards which led to the particular counselor being removed from the list of referees for such services at that time.


She has since been referred to a counselor to have the matter looked at unfortunately at market rates though I wish it were pro-bono but such is the scheme of business. We need some sort of residential support systems that negates the need for referrals that could end up costing so much money that some displaced and homeless lgbt people already do not have. It is good to know that persons are seeking out ways to help each other in the community but our lesbian sisters need equal attention just as MSMs do or get as there is a perception that the women are often overlooked in the eyes of some persons as for me I say flat out that they are overlooked often times.


I am keeping my fingers crossed on this one and hopes it works out for the best.


Peace and tolerance


H